Tag Archives: Helicopter

Question?: Angry Autistic Kids

Thomas asks…

Need help if my three year old sounds autistic?

Hello I have a three year old, that has recently been tested for autism, but came back inconclusive for a number of reasons i.e. When asking me about my sons communication skills, I didn’t know what they meant by Joint attention or gestures ( I know I’m stupid) so I would say ‘no’ that he doesn’t do those things… even though judging by my son’s speech therapist and the psychologist and developmental ped that assessed him could see that he could do those things. So anyway, my son is going to have a second assessment and when they ask me questions, I want to make sure that I get it right. Here are a list of things that my son does.
1. Uses joint attention…. to much intact.. he would look at me..point.. and look at me to show me a thing he’s interested in i.e. this could be images in a book, showing me he’s drawing… showing em something he’s interested in etc etc.
2. My son has a speech delay
3. My son uses a lot natural gestures ( That I HAVE NOT TAUGHT HIM).. so this could be ” brushing his teeth” would be in gestures, using his fingers, showing his teeth and animating with his finger the motion to brush his teeth…..” wash hands” would be the two of his hands clamped together doing the motion of washing his hands…..” upset’ would be shrugging shoulders would be or folding arms. ” open” would be animating different ways with he’s hands to open with an object.
3. Plays toys appropriately and has good pretend/imaginary play skills i.e. flying helicopter or rocket, cooking, feeding baby etc.. although occasionally he would lie down sideways and build he’s blocks ( which is a concern
4. If he does not get what he wants this would go into a tantrum
5. doesn’t seem to understand patience some of the times *sigh*
6.Flaps arms when angry
7. Plays with kids and knows how to share
8.Has no routine issue whatsoever, but remembers the places which I treat him too e.g. Mcdonalds…toy stores and if we walk past these ” special treat stores” wants to go in *sigh again*
9.Toilet trained.. sleep is fine
10. Can be too hyperactive, running around ( which is tiring)
11. Always wants to play with me ( which can be annoying sometimes) this could be him making me want to out on our 3D glasses and him pointing to the mirror so that we can pull faces… our sleeping game, so he would gesture sleep, and I have to fake sleep and he would diliberalty make noise and I’ll have to wake up and tickle him…. also with games too.
12. Self care needs are advanced
13. Really good at imitating
14. Can be shy
15. seems to understand more, even though speech is limited
16. seems to always want my attention…through crying… wanting me to cuddle him… playing
17. Has a good sense of where I am, e.g say like if I am out of his sight, he would always look back to s where I am or where I have gone too.

I think the main thing for me is his tantrums, he may have an allergy too. Also, he is quite shy and does not show his true self to people.. most of the things have mentioned on this list..only me, his speech therapist, family and close friends have seen this side of him, to strangers he doesn’t open up easily which is sad. Anyway, does my list sound like he has autism and what concerns should I bring up to the psychologist?
@Alicia- Thanks for your comment, when actually listing things which my son does, autism sounds less and I am actually thinking that it could be ADHD..OR ADD.. his dad has said this, that it sounds like ADHD not autism. Although, It can be argued that the fact because he is speech delayed, this adds to frustration..if it is ADHD and not autism, I would be worried that it may result for him to take medication.. which I would not result too. I am aware that ADHD cannot be diagnosed under the age of 5.

admin answers:

Autism is the inability to understand other people as being people with their own wants, needs, and emotions. Something that three-year children also tend to be bad at. Like what has been said before, most of what you are describing sounds a lot like a normal three-year old. The speech doesn’t seem to be important, as your son seems to be able to communicate. Most children learn to talk well because baby talk just gets a “What did you say” response from adults, so children learn to enunciate so as to be understood and get what they want from adults. You’re sons gestures sound like he has found a way of getting out of having to talk properly (if you have ever learned a second language, then you would know how difficult this is). I am curious as to what what would happen if you refused to acknowledge his gestures and insist that he talk more to get what he wants.

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fifty shades of oh my god, mom, seriously?


It’s been a hard three days. Last night was tough. Tonight was tougher. For the sake of our sanity, it’s time to laugh. For that reason, tomorrow’s Diary post is going to be funny. Nothing but funny. There, consider yourself warned.

~ Diary’s Facebook status last night


As many of you know, I post periodically on Diary’s Facebook page. Usually in the evenings, I’ll share a thought – something I found funny perhaps, a cute kid story, or maybe something that struck me as particularly profound. I usually don’t stray too far off the reservation. Although my ‘real life’ sense of humor tends toward being pretty crass, I like to keep things clean here in Diary Land. It’s a family show, after all and my greatest hope is that someday my children will read what I’ve written here. Well, maybe not here today, but ya know, in general. Anyway, point is, I try to mostly stay within the navigational buoys.

One night a couple of weeks ago, however, I veered into some previously uncharted territory. I made a reference to the Fifty Shades of Grey books. I wasn’t sure how it would fly, but I figured that the odds were pretty good that in this crowd, the majority of whom are, I assume, moms, I wasn’t going to be the only one who knew what Charlie Tango was. (Christian Grey’s helicopter for the uninitiated.)

This is what I posted ..

The responses were hilarious. There was a lot of commentary on the awful writing (agreed), but even more “Gee, I have no idea what you’re talking about. Laters, baby.” confessions and even an admission to owning a “We aim to please” t-shirt. Good stuff.

And then there was a comment that went like this …

It was Ana’s mom who had her when she was very young (goodness, I don’t know how I knew that)!

To which I responded ..

Cause I had to ..

With this ..


The next day at work, I couldn’t resist sharing the story with a colleague. He gave me one in return.

A friend’s wife had started the first book in the series. His buddy was, well, shall we say ‘excited’ to hear about it. He asked her for details, and was extremely disappointed when she told him that she’d lost interest in the book and abandoned it less than halfway through.

He was then surprised and delighted, if not slightly confused, when he then found all three books on their shared Kindle a couple of weeks later. Once again, he was, well, ‘excited’ to hear about it. He climbed into bed one night and feverishly asked the question.

“So, what happened? I thought you didn’t like the Fifty Shades books, but now I see you’ve read them all.”

He waited anxiously for her answer.

“Oh yeah” she said, shrugging, “I wasn’t into the first one at all, but your mom said I really should give it another chance so I did.”

According to the story, he looked at her for a moment, processed what she had just told him and said as he turned out the light, “I never, ever want to talk about this again.”


Last Sunday, while everyone was puttering around the house, I snuck outside with the intention of transporting myself to Seattle for a little .. um .. intrigue. I got about five minutes into Ana and Oh dear God is she seriously staring down at her knotted fingers, battling with her inane inner goddess or using the word ‘there’ to describe her nether region AGAIN? when Katie came outside. She walked over and immediately asked the question.


I stared at her for a moment, my mouth slack. There was no sound coming out.

“You OK, Mama?” she asked.

I blinked.

“Oh, hi, baby,” I said, pretending that somehow I hadn’t seen her in the uh, glare of the sun. “Oh, just a silly book.”

“What’s it called?”

I blinked again. I was cornered.

“It’s part of a series. It’s um, Fifty Shades of Grey.”

As soon as the words were out, I panicked. I pictured her in a bookstore with a friend and said friend’s parents and her seeing the book and pointing and shouting, “MY MOM IS READING THAT BOOK!” and then some lady in an ill-fitting suit from DSS coming to my door and telling me that I got some ‘splainin to do, Lucy and then I *really* panicked and when I really panic I start talking which is really the worst thing you can do when you really panic cause then you know, you say stupid stuff that you really, really wish you hadn’t, like, oh, I don’t know, like when your kid asks if you like the books and you can’t seem to stop the words before they’re out and you hear them and they are,

“Yeah, they’re pretty good. But um, well, there’s some pretty inappropriate scenes in them, ya know, like romance stuff, so it’s not really something to mention around other people, OK?”

And then it’s sort of like you’re underwater when you hear her saying, “Oh my God, that’s gross,” and you know that she doesn’t necessarily think that it’s gross like ya know, intrinsically but that it’s gross because her MOM is reading it and then you think of this …

… and you realize that you know EXACTLY how she feels.


Ed Note: Today’s Tweet of the day ..

Nearly 9,000 signatures objecting to @joeNBC @Morning_Joe ‘s reckless comments re #autism. Pls sign + share http://www.change.org/petitions/joe-scarborough-msnbc-retract-your-statements-about-autism-and-the-colorado-shooting @Starbucks

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